A Powerful Solution to Stress Recovery.

A Powerful Solution to Stress Recovery.

I dare to say the only way to successfully walk away from high stress, overwhelming stress and burnout is to change thinking patters, beliefs, values and other behaviours that actually give a platform for the stress to wreck our lives. It is only limiting thinking patterns and behaviours that feed or turn potential stressful situations into the real thing. Running the most appropriate thinking patterns for any stressful situation turns stress into solutions. Solutions lead to confidence, courage and leadership free of debilitating stress.

 

It may not be popular at first because it is not obvious and most people do not like to be put in the hot seat of responsibility. I am not here just for the sake of being a nice guy. My objective is to make one hell of a difference to as many people’s lives as I can. I have said it so many times I have lost count and I will continue saying it so that more and more people eventually get the message. Then they can walk away from overwhelming stress also at the same time learn how to manage stressful situations without becoming a victim of them.

 

Yes, today everyone is connected to the internet and everything seems to be for free. We are all sucked into thinking that we can fix all our problems by searching for the internet answer. Certainly you can find many people offering all sorts of help and yes, it is usually for a lot of money. That is fine for the really wealthy and what about those who have been hit badly by the world financial crisis or simply in one darn great hole of despair when it come to their lives and their finances.

 

Whichever category you fit in I have a fantastic deal for you at an unthinkable price. No it’s is not just under $2,000, not even just under $1,000: No this is the deal of the century because this information is worth a gold mine. It is called ‘The Phoenix Solution’. The Phoenix Solution will take the ashes of your life, errors, mistakes, missed opportunities and whatever else then turn them into a new life of success and abundance. Sounds too good to be true, yes.

 

So what is the deal?

 

The deal is this. Everything you have in your life today whether it is good, bad, indifferent or redundant it all comes from your past thinking patterns. Every idea you have, every decision, you take, every action you put your energy into is a direct result of your past thinking patterns. Every house, car, wife, husband, job, business, whatever you have is a direct result of your past thinking patterns. Every crime you have committed, every good deed, every belief, every, intuitive thought, every anger, every emotion every fear, doubt and stress, they are all a direct result of your past thinking patterns.

 

Now, if you are struggling to cope, depressed with your life, unable to see your way forward into prosperity, unsure how you will pay the bills or coping with massive stress, you have been running some pretty lousy thinking patterns, beliefs, values and habitual behaviours. I do not care how much or how little education you have had or how brilliant you were at college or university even how you dropped out of college and opted for a job that at least put some money in your pocket.

 

You will not have learnt any of the Phoenix solution lesson at school, college or university but you might have learnt a few of them if you studied a MBA course.

 

The Phoenix Solution is all about teaching you thinking patterns, beliefs and values that have been proven to work for thousands of years. They are as good today as 5 thousand years ago. Now, this last statement, as good as 5 thousand years ago, should be telling you there is something important here, sit up and take notice!

 

The people in our world who have done great things and created massive personal fortunes have all held the same vital knowledge. They have also, all without fail, done the same things that have evolved from the same dynamic thinking patterns, beliefs and values, which someone passed onto them with a sting in the tail attachment. The sting in the tail said; never tell anyone these secrets because anyone can achieve anything with this information so to cut out the competition keep this a secret. That is why 90% of the worlds wealth is held by 1% of the people.

 

Now I might be crazy offering such a deal and then I know if I made this free no one would value it or bother with it. So I am asking you to afford just over $2 US for each of 225 coaching days over one year.

 

Each day of the week you will receive a lesson that can change your life from struggle to abundance. Each lesson lasts just a few minutes. That is all you have to do, just a few minutes every day. With each lesson there is a task for you to complete so you integrate the lesson and the learning. The Phoenix Solution course in thinking patterns continues for a year because making changes can be easy and also tough with resistances because you do not understand or you are full of doubt or fear.

 

The course duration of almost one year gives time to make sure you do not fall back into old redundant and limiting thinking patterns. The course is in a few minutes modules each week day so to minimise any additional stress caused by adding more demands to your day.

 

Can you imagine receiving professional training and coaching for the most important information any one can want for just $2 US per day.  That is $450 US paid by monthly instalment of $37.50. Just think of it, coaching five days a week for almost a year for only $37.50

 

Happy thinking patterns

 

Robert P. Denton

Senior trainer The Phoenix Solution to stress.   Contact robertdenton@rdcoaching-power.com

A Solution to Moving out of Stress or Burnout

THE PHOENIX SOLUTION

“We all Create Our Own Reality – We all create our own reality as a direct consequence of the beliefs, values and thinking patterns we have been given also have chosen ourselves.”

 I would love to offer you a pill to take and your high stress, overwelming stress or burnout would melt away. The fact is there is no such thing and likely never will be because these levels of stress and burnout are directly related to how each of us uniquely thinks about our lives, jobs, environments, etc., also the choices we make.

Whoever thinks about their thinking patterns, beliefs and values?  We are more prone to putting our mental energy into finding someone or something else to blame for our current problem or situation.

I know the next question is tough and I mean it with sincerity because it is fundamental to healing stress and moving forward and enjoying life again.

When do we ever take responsibly for our own flawed thoughts, decisions and actions?

Understanding that you create your own reality is the beginning of a better more effective way of thinking. This is because you have just taken control and responsibility for what you think, how you think and the results you get.

Read the above two sentences again and take a few moments to think of the implication.

If you are in high stress or moderate burnout your thinking patterns will be distorted by the abnormally high levels of the hormone cortisol. I have analysed this problem and come to the conclusion there is a mental defence system with the purpose of preventing the person from doing more of what had done, which lead to their overwhelm or burnout. For more on this subject my several articles related to the 7th Sense.

To overcome this problem I have found there is a specific 7th Sense intelligence and internal language. Learning the language is important because fundamentally it is understanding what your body and mind are trying to communicate to you what is wrong and what to change.  Recognising and understanding this language means we an find the answer to how to move forward in our lives without activating the stress symptoms that are so dibilitating.

How you react to the following statement will give a clue to your next future. The fact you are reading this suggests you are suffering some form of high stress or burnout. That stress is a direct result of the thinking patterns with the subsequent choices you made and the decisions and actions you took in the past. 

If you get what your thinking patterns are designed to produce. Don’t you think it would be pretty smart to analyse and change anything that does not serve your wishes or achieves your dreams or goals?

Don’t you think it would be better to know what results specific thinking patterns will produce?

Don’t you think it would be better to take control of your thoughts and therefore control of your future?

Don’t you think it would be pretty cool to learn some thinking patterns that successful people are also using to create the abundance they decided they wanted?

Yes you know you are thinking and what you are thinking. What 90% of the population do not realise is that their action thoughts ar not necessarily the best thought patterns. To stay employable and useful in this world the smart people constantly develop their skill set.  For example:

When did you last analyse and upgrade your thinking strategy skill set for planning and creating your future?

Do you think the above could have something to do with the reason why you are experiencing high stress problems in your life?

For just $35 US or 23.80€ per month. That is 16 days at $2.18 US or 1.48€ per lesson. 225 lessons per year at $2.18 US or 1.48€ per lesson. For this  you get to learn beliefs, values, behaviours and thinking patterns that the successful and influential movers and shakers of this world have known all along and kept them a secret.

This is The Phoenix Solution.

Are you aware that?

You are an amazingly talented creator of your present and future, everything you currently have in your life, good , bad or indifferent is the direct result of your past thinking patterns, beliefs, values and behaviours.

Each thought you have is a seed that wings its way into the universal field of energy and information. From a small acorn a mighty oak will grow. Whatever the seed so will manifest the plan.

Exactly in the same way and for the same reasons you always get results according to the thinking patterns you use. Yours, mine and everyone’s current experience is the result of our individual thinking patterns.

To change the colour or shape of a plant it is necessary to change the DNA information. Nature has being doing this constantly for millions of years very successfully.  That is how it evolves and adapts to the changing environment.  To change thinking patterns it is necessary to change some beliefs, values, habitual behaviours and sometimes the thinking environment, to produce the desired result. That is rather than what you don’t want but are having to live and cope with right now. 

This is what The Phoenix Solution offers to do.

Here is something very important to know. You should know about how your mind and thinking patterns that control your entire life works.

“Successfully managing your life is like managing a successful business. “

A business can only afford to make so many mistakes before getting into deep trouble. That is why successful businesses spend so much money on acquiring the best advice, training and support while looking for the most affordable price.

Exactly the same applies in managing our own lives, too many errors of judgement, too many false, beliefs, ideas or values, too many wrong decisions and we find ourselves in a terrible downward spiral. All the time loosing direction, confidence and almost loosing hope. I have personally experienced this things as I went from overwhelming stress into a life and career stopping burnout. Because I realised what had happened and knew something about the mind I worked my way out of burnout while also learning and studying exactly what was happening. This research has been going on now more that 10 years and the myths, paradoxes, misunderstanding and understading of what is really going on in the mind has be truely amazing.

This course called The Phoenix Solution is going to give you the thinking patterns, beliefs, values and behaviours that every successful entrepreneur uses to create their abundant life and future.

Used effectively, the information in this course can take you from the ashes of past burnt out decisions, beliefs and values into setting up your dreams to create what you really want and bring it into your reality.

Years ago when I was approaching burnout, I still had several of my companies, I would have thought it crazy to give such extraordinary value at such an incredibly low price, but that was limiting stress thinking. Limiting stress thinking is driven by survival, fear and what else that is out of step with the current reality.

My goal is to move as many people out of the stress and struggle spiral with information that we all should have learnt at school. I am simply doing what the smart movers, shakers and thinkers do. I have changed my stress limiting thinking patterns for those that are smarter and better. That is why I am making it available to everyone at a price they can easily afford. Almost 6000 people have read my articles on stress. The majority do not want to spend any money and think they can fix their stress themselves with their stress thinking patterns. Yes, some will succeed but at what price of emotional stress and financial cost and how long will it take them? Is that 1year, 3 years 10 years, right up to the day they retire or the day they die, how long?

Why suffer when The Phoenix Solution will take you from the core of the problem into your solution.

The Phoenix Solution course is almost a year long because it takes time to make and imbed the changes that will make a difference to your life and less risk of falling back into old redundant thinking patterns. That said, almost right from the beginning you should begin to be aware of changes. No, this is not a flash in the pan fickle promise to help you change your life in 5 minutes. I will accompany you right to the finish of the course and show you and coach you on how to achieve what you want. No one can do the work for you.

Yes, it does demand effort on your part, this is not a free ride, no effort no results. Just a few minutes each week day is all it takes. Where is your determination to have what you want. Please note, I do not accept martyrs. I want live heros who want to be successful.

I have spent two years preparing this course in a way that it can be so easily available to almost anyone. Thinking that anyone in any state of high stress would not jump at the chance, I just cannot help thinking of the expression; ‘looking a gift horse in the mouth’.

As an example of limiting thinking through best intentions, I have published my personal story of waiting for a company to finish what was in their contract. I waited and wasted two weeks. Then two more weeks have passed and time is running out before the snows come and all will be blocked until the spring. All winter I shall be suffering with the cold simply because I did not take the right action immediately. I was too easy with the company. Now and all winter I’m paying the price for that one simple error. Why? Because for a moment I hesitated, letting an old redundant value that no longer works, take charge of my thinking pattern.

Act now and save yourself further struggle, further stress and more mistakes that keep you in that limiting spiral that keeps you out in the cold.

For more information about The Phoenix Solution training and coaching course write to me Robert Denton at  robertdenton@rdcoaching-power.com

With best wishes in building your very best future.

Robert Denton.

Stress Recovery and the 4 Healing Questions

Stress Recovery and the 4 Healing Questions

 

My name is Robert Denton, I have been through overwhelming stress, seriously serious burnout and back. Well actually not back, rather forward.

 

I use the word recovery in the title of many of my articles on healing serious stress because that is the word people so often use as a search word. In most cases the word recovery as far as overwhelming stress and burnout is concerned is a ‘fausse ami’ (false friend). Recovery means going back to where you were in the past that actually got you into the high stress mess.  This is an example of how some thinking patterns hold us back. You see, where we put our mind that is where we go. So focusing on stress and recovery simply feeds more stress to recover from because it is not possible to go back in time or space. Also, as far as high stress is concerned it is not a good idea.

 

Now if we focus on healing and the future also changing many thinking patterns along with those two things, now that is something else. The new or changed behaviour is putting our thoughts in a totally different place with absolutely different results.

 

Sorry to blow my own trumpet and if I do not you simply will not know. Therefore I will explain that after my burnout healing I started studying what stress is, how it behaves, what are the consequences and why. Most of all I analysed clients stress and my own stress over a 30 year period.

 

The results are amazing, full of paradoxes and frequently I found so many beliefs about stress are quite the opposite to what is really happening.

 

In healing overwhelming stress and burnout, it is so important to understand the stress is being fed by stress enhancing thinking patterns. Hating every moment of going to work because someone is making your life hell just increases the stress because that is where your mind is, it is what you are expecting therefore it is what you get. That is where you are placing your thought energy. That energy is so powerful it perpetuates the situation.

 

Growing rich is fed with rich thinking patterns.

A life full of struggle is full of struggle thinking patterns.

Just surviving is fed with survival thinking patterns.

A life of poverty is fed with poverty thinking.

A life of abundance is fed with abundance thinking patterns and so on.

 

The 4 healing questions will start you off on a journey of knowing yourself in order that you can heal your own stress. That is a thousand times better than popping anti depressant pills all the time.

 

Which do you want?  To be dependant on your doctor and a bottle of pills that numbs your brain and senses or learn how to get into stress healing thinking patterns and grabbing back full control of your life. Which do you want, to give up responsibility for your self, becoming like a child that has to be looked after all the time or to experience all your senses, some of which you may have never realised existed. The five basic senses are just the beginning. So if you want to start enjoying life again, mastering your full capacity to express and enjoy yourself then here is what you can do.

 

Once a week for 45 weeks of the year you will be coached on the internet by me. I will start by asking you the 4 primary healing questions. Then you have to do your part. So it is like this. The success of this training and coaching is in you discovering what you want also what you want to change. The next stage is also up to you. Another powerful advantage is that daily coaching and reminding yourself of what you do want is infinitely better that a once a week coaching bash and a void in between.

 

Normally an hour of personal coaching can cost anything from US$ 200 to US$ 1,000.Fair enough that is one-to-one coaching on a high level. For just $33.25 you can have the same powerful coaching. So why is it so reasonable. The simple answer is that for most people and situations intensive coaching is not always the most effective. New research has shown how a fantastic coaching can take place with a few statements and carefully thought questions.

 

Write to me Robert Denton at robertdenton@rdcoaching-power.com  for further details of this special coaching and a super bonus.

 

You know life is one continuous learning process. Two weeks ago a new wood fired oven, room heater and source of central heating was being installed in my house in the Alps. On the Tuesday I helped to transport the 350Kilo beast up the mountain. With impeccable planning that went perfectly. The plumber was due on the Wednesday and I had an uneasy feeling. The Plumber arrived as promised but it quickly became apparent that he had no intention of doing the work and said he wanted to submit another estimate.  I felt troubled because I knew that meant loosing time and the snows are due at any moment. Once the snows fall access for all but that which can be carried in a rucksack will be blocked until next March or April.

 

I stayed calm and two weeks passed with no word so I rang the supplier. The manageress was surprised to hear my concern as she had understood from her team all went well. The fact is that her team had tried to cover up a serious error on their part, which was the cause of the plumber not making the necessary central heating pipe connections.

 

What was my lesson? Oh yes, There are times to be kind and tolerant and there are times to take action instantly. Communication is a great thing so long as people are communicating in the right way. So my intention of being understanding  and patient may have cost me a winter of sub-zero temperatures of -11°C to -22°C with only one fire to keep the chalet warm. Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

 

With further analysis of my intentions and non action I realised I had cared for all those others including the ones that created the mess and further delay and had not cared for myself and my own interests.  You might think that is just selfish but let’s remember who is supposed to be providing a service and who is paying the bill. The world is changing extremely fast and old redundant values like being patient have to be re-assesed.

 

So waste time avoiding action if you will. Remember hesitation is a costly and often sobering luxury that in most cases has hidden costs.

 

This is Robert Denton

Performance trainer/coach in healing stress

HIGH STRESS SYMPTOMS

HIGH STRESS SYMPTOMS

 

Recognise your stress and stressors when all seems calm.

 

      Most people recognise stress and the signs of stress. Being quickly irritated, short tempered, and unhappy with situations that never seem to change or improve. Feeling left out, unwanted, unappreciated, constantly experiencing low moral, regular headaches and associated notions of being stuck in situations you would rather not be in the middle of but see no way out of.

     Those things are bad enough. And they should be taken greater notice of instead of being aggressive with someone who is probably innocent and just happens to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Yes, that poor unsuspecting person who by chance is unlucky enough to have walked into your company and your stress mood.

     OK, that’s enough of that I’m not here to beat you up, rather to open your awareness to something really important when it comes to managing massive stress.

    What I am talking about here is those powerful also sometimes subtle stress signs that are actually hammering on your pain centres to say STOP!

     What do most of us do? That’s right, we go to the doctor, osteopath, chiropractor, or dive into the pharmacy for some pain killers. What else do we do? Yes, we ignore the message to stop. We do the worst thing possible by putting all our energy into doing what is necessary to keep on going. Keep on doing what we have been doing. Keep on doing all those things that maintain and add to our existing stress load.

     Mostly stress sufferers are aware of most stressors and keep promising themselves they will do something about them before hiding them into the deeper recesses of their mind. But what about the other signs of massive stress that seem to have no connection to the stress level. One symptom that frequently strikes men is crippling back pain in the lower back. These attacks seem to suddenly arrive for no apparent reason when the person is possibly walking, getting up from a chair, or doing something neither emotionally challenging nor physically demanding.

     Certainly there is one physical movement that will put you on your back for ten days that arrives the day you leave for that long awaited or long dreaded summer holiday.

     How to put yourself out of action for 10 days! Pack your holiday suitcase to the limit while getting really stressed and hating the very idea of the journey to the aeroport. Then the flight followed by the hassle of finding your hotel, booking in and finally unpacking. Once your suitcase is packed and you have managed to close the zip fasteners, pull it to the edge of the bed. Now stand up, face the exit door, without moving your feet rotate your upper body, grab the suitcase and head for the door jerking the suitcase off the bed. If that does not have you on your back on the floor in 3 seconds in absolute agony be assured it will at some later moment when you are least suspecting it.

     My personal experience plus those of clients and friends who have experienced or frequently experience such back pains reveals an interesting pattern.

     I have noted many clients and friends who live high stress lives mostly due to their jobs or their personal lives. The times that they have collapsed with severe back pain on the first day of their summer holiday is significant. Despite treatment by an osteopath, chiropractor or masseur such therapies invariably have little beneficial  effect until the last day or two of the holiday.

     I have realised a scenario that may sound strange even bizarre yet in my study of the neuro science of inner intelligence and thinking patterns it comes to make a great deal of sense. It goes something like this. The first day of your holiday you know you can relax because you do not have to wind yourself up into that stress performance for Monday morning and the rest of the week. Imagine that your seventh sense inner intelligence suddenly wakes up to the fact that you are ready to relax. It knows that very quickly you will be hit by all sorts of other stressors before too long so now is the time to act. Your inner intelligence first gets you to be careless about moving that heavy suitcase or some other heavy item. Your 7^th sense knows that within 3 seconds to 24 hrs. you will be in such agony there is no chance of doing anything other than lay down, take things easy and just relax for 10 days because it is simply too painful to move. The interesting common occurrence is that the holiday back syndrome does not strike until you arrive in the hotel. There is an interesting logic to this. If the back pain occurs immediately there is a chance you will cancel the holiday, which is not necessarily a good thing. When the back pain strikes in the hotel you have few options but to lie down and let go. The next interesting observation is that all the pain always seems to disappear by the time the unfortunate person is ready to resume their work. There is an interesting neuro feedback strategy that responds to escaping a family stressor back to the office. I’ll explore this in another article.

     The above scenario is just one stress symptom. There are untold others out there somewhere. Your job is to find and recognise the signs or symptoms of massive stress that frequently slow you down. Then you should be looking for the connected stressor or stressors. If you cannot do this yourself go out and find a qualified a coach who can give you a hand.

      Now, forget about meditation, guided relaxation, having fun, workouts at the fitness club or whatever else you have been trying to do to lower your stress. If you do not take notice of your 7^th sense messages and do something about recognising your stressors your anti-stress strategies are a waste of time and effort. The only solution is in taking action to break those vicious circles. Why? Because your 7^th sense or inner intelligence will not give up until you do change your life.

     What is the alternative? Well, it’s not difficult to predict because it is so common these days. Your 7^th sense and inner intelligence simply stops you in your tracks. Yes, BURNOUT. I really do not care what burnout means to you. Whatever level of burnout it’s all bad news.

     I know the decisions are difficult, let’s face it you have been creating your own trap for years. Therefore, the way out is rarely if ever simple or easy. Yes we all have to think about our job, finances and all those other things that are essential. The most valuable awareness is that there are options even though we may not see them.

     What are the consequences of not taking action? Well the list is fairly short so it is easy to follow.

1. FOLLOWING BURNOUT THERE IS:
2. LOOSING YOUR JOB OR BUSINESS.
3. LOOSING YOUR HOME because you cannot afford the mortgage payments or your wife takes it in the divorce settlement.
4. LOOSING YOUR WIFE AND CHILDREN.
5. LOOSING YOUR CAR, BOAT, LIGHT AEROPLANE, GOLF CLUB MEMBERSHIP, ETC.
6. LOOSING YOUR FRIENDS.

 

THE FOLLOWING ARE THE MOST SERIOUS AND THE MOST DIFFICULT TO RECOVER!!!

1. LOOSING YOUR SELF CONFIDENCE.
2. LOOSING YOUR VISION FOR THE FUTURE.
3. LOOSING THE CAPABILITY TO MAKE THINGS HAPPEN.
4. LOOSING YOUR SOUL IN DESPERATION AND DESPAIR.

There are two more that are really extraordinarrily serious that deserves their own place.

• LOOSING ALL SENSE OF YOUR REASON TO BE.
• LOOSING YOUR SENSE OF IDENTITY.

 

     The above is a stark warning. The trouble is that hundreds of thousands of people are doing all the wrong things and hitting the 10 list above every day.

     Do you really want to join the list? The sad fact is that if you are reading this article you are most probably already in deep trouble. If so it is only you who can make the decision to change your life. Why not start right now before things really get serious or are you there already?

 

Robert Denton   personal anti-stress coach, sports/mind and performance coach, neuro science coach

info@asr-key.ch

The Neuro Science of the Seventh Sense

Neuro Science of the Seventh Sense

 

Since first writing about seventh sense intelligence, observations and study of the subject has already developed considerably. Just recognising the presence or existence of the seventh sense intelligence has opened a whole new insight into behaviour and limiting behaviour programming. At present this study is focused on 7^th sense intelligence and the paradoxical resistance to recovery from overwhelming stress and burnout.

 

The fact is clear, there are a very large number of people who discover that recovery from overwhelming stress or burnout is far from easy regardless of their efforts. This immediately suggests to me there is possibly a flaw in the treatment or the wrong thing is being treated. This is most likely due to the old habit of treating the symptom not the cause. The people I hear from report that whatever treatment they try nothing seems to make any difference. Over the past few months since writing this series of articles on stress I have had almost 5000 readers. I realise this is just the tip of the tip of the iceberg. The problem of very slow recovery rates is certainly a major source of concern.

 

I had been working on this problem for some time when several Ah-ha moments happened in quick succession. The first of these was a sudden understanding of the deeper meaning of the word recovery. Let’s face it, anyone suffering any form of mental, emotional or physical injury just wants to recover as quickly as possible. This is where the neuro science comes into the picture. Word meanings and implications are different for all of us, which accounts for part of our individual uniqueness. Beliefs, values, education, indoctrination, traumas, dramas and highly charged stressful situations, all add special meaning to the word recovery. For those experiencing overwhelming stress or burnout will have a new subliminal meaning to this word. In all forms of communication the words we choose can make a significant difference to the outcome of intentions.

 

Recovery from a broken leg or arm will more than likely encourage the person to be particularly careful when doing whatever they were doing that led to their breaking a limb. The trauma, the drama and the emotional and physical pain or experience memory were all in real time at the time of the accident and very clear in the conscious mind. Mostly anyone having that experience will warn themselves to be careful. When they start to be in a similar situation their inner alarm bells should be enough to wake the dead. The challenge with overwhelming stress and burnout is that most people do not see it coming. Suddenly it is dominating their life and they have no idea what it is, how it happened or what to do about it. It is not a pain one can touch and shout “ouch.” It is in your mind and every part of your body but it is not something you can see hear or touch.

 

The first dawning realisation of the 7^th sense of ‘recover’ was that everyone in this condition is blocking themselves from recovery. Imbedded habitual or auto-active behaviours and limiting thinking patterns are far better understood since the emergence or neuro-sciences in the past 25 years. These automatic behaviours and limiting thinking strategies for whatever reason become our own stumbling blocks. In this study I have come to the conclusion that the ‘recovery’ paradoxically is a psychological or emotional block. The seventh sense intelligence almost certainly linked to the immune and inner healing systems, seems to click into operation when there is no conscious awareness of repeating a dangerous action. For example; focusing on and working towards ‘recovery’ is the last thing your inner intelligence wants you to do. The problem lays within the fact that you have no idea about your 7^th sense, your immune system or your inner healer or how to communicate with these incredible intelligences. Break a leg, seriously cut yourself, have an infectious disease or illness are all very tangible experiences of pain and discomfort. Overwhelming stress and burnout creeps up during a long time span, may be over many years. You are living and suffering with it long before it becomes apparent.

 

Imagine you could actually communicate with your 7^th sense and inner healing systems and the conversation goes something like this:

 

You.  Look you guys I’m in overwhelming stress and heading into burnout. It is ruining my life, all I want to do is recover to how I was before.

 

7^th sense. You’ve got to be seriously kidding us. How do you think you got into overwhelming stress in the first place?

 

You. I don’t really know, things got out of hand, I struggled for several years and then this overwhelming stress sort of snuck up on me .Suddenly I was aware that it dominated my entire life.

 

7^th sense. Exactly, and you expect us to calmly take you right back there to ‘recover’ so you can do exactly the same thing or things all over again and arrive right back here in overwhelming stress.

 

You. Oh no, it not like that. I shall be careful not to do the same things as I did before.

 

7^th sense. Oh, rock on! When are you going to get a little bit of reality? You don’t know how, why or when the stress started and you certainly have not a clue what to do about it. Your thinking patterns are so stuck in the thinking strategies that got you into overwhelming stress in the first place, you wouldn’t even notice the first sigh of doing again what you did before the stress overwhelm. For us the word recovery means taking you back to where you were and what you were doing before the stress symptoms stated. That is impossible because as clever as we are we cannot take you back in time. Secondly, as guardians of your life force, health and wellbeing we will not take you back mentally or emotionally to where you were before to do the same thing all over again.

 

You. OK, that is beginning to make sense. I had not thought of it like that. Right, recovery from stress actually means going back in time. But I don’t understand because all my life recovery from an injury or illness has always meant to get better.

 

7^th sense. Ah yes, that is right in general. Recovery and repair from a broken leg to return the bone to how it is meant to be. That is, returning it to its most appropriate form. Returning you back in time to the thinking strategies and programs that got you into overwhelming stress is not an ideal, practical or appropriate thing to do. What you have missed is that your environment has changed dramatically in the past 15 to 30 years and now it is in the process of changing infinitely faster than you can imagine. In the past, life largely remained unchanged for centuries. Today your DNA programming system is having to evolve at a lightening fast speed. If you are not changing your beliefs, values and even environment fast enough stress starts to mount fast. It is not easy to change these things and it certainly takes time on your own. There is another solution but it requires that you begin thinking in an unusual way given your condition.

 

You. How can I think in a different way?

 

7^th sense. That is a good question. The quickest way to think in a different way is to change those beliefs and values that controlled current or previous thinking. For example: Find all the beliefs, values and thinking patterns that got you into overwhelming stress and change them all for new beliefs to live your life in a different way. This does require that you also do something you may not have done consciously before. This is consciously planning a new future complete with a detailed plan. Changing your environment will also help this process so long as the new environment supports the new planned future life style. In simple terms, your social environment is changing so fast it is important to adopt new beliefs and values that support a modern life and replace those that got you into so much stress thinking. Old familiar and redundant thinking may seem comfortable but in reality it leads you into creating many new problems. Normally changing is a difficult process if working on your own or even with a partner. The best option is to engage a personal life coach that specialises in this subject.

 

You. OK. I understand that I need to plan my future also get myself specialised guidance but what can I do to start the ball rolling?

 

7^th Sense. The first thing you can do is change the words you use regularly that actually undermine your efforts. Start with changing the word ‘recovery’ to ‘moving forward into your future.’ So in the future, instead of saying you want to recover from overwhelming stress, you will say; I want to move out of stress and move forward into a less stressful fulfilling future. Notice the word move also that it is repeated. Get the feeling of moving forward into a better future. This simple change permits us to stop blocking you. Then we can start to help and support you in every way we can. You see making that one simple change will cause a huge shift at your unconscious and 7^th sense intelligence levels. Now, make the experience. First say I want to recover from overwhelming stress. Notice how you feel as you say it and after. Secondly, say I want to move out of stress and into a less stressful future. Again notice how you feel having said the new words.

 

Next stage; start designing that new less stressful fulfilling future and make your mind-movie until you can see yourself living it. The more you show us what you want the more we can help you obtain it. That’s all for now, we’ll see you in your new less stressful future, Bye for now.

 

Robert Denton    Mind-power and performance coach without the stress.

Recovery from Stress and Burnout- Seeing through the Eye of the Tiger

Changing Stress into Satisfaction

 THE EYE OF THE TIGER.  It is said the eye is the window into the soul. In this web-log article I look at a stressful case history and show how looking into the eye and the soul of a stressful situation, answers and solutions are found.

OK. Many of my web-log articles about stress, overwhelming stress and burnout are about what is happening and why.  The following is a real live case that illustrates how we all can easily fall into certain types of stress because of past programming or conditioning.

 

The root cause of this stressful case came from the fact that my client’s wife told her mother personal and sensitive details of her husbands personal financial gains. This was highly sensitive because the husband had been through a six month long mega financial stress crisis of his own as a result of the world financial crisis. The stress arose from fearing that his improved financial situation could melt away so easily. He felt his financial situation was far from stable and certainly did not want anyone thinking he was wealthy again.

 

The stress trigger occurred during a convivial lunch with all the family. The client’s wife mentioned that on holiday she had bought a dress and her husband had made a present of a hat to complete the ensemble.

 

The mother and mother-in-law said to the husband sarcastically “well that didn’t melt much of your money.” Immediately the cat was out of the bag. The client knew his wife had been gossiping again, sharing his personal sensitive information. The wife immediately realised that her husband knew she had been gossiping again. The wife said, “Mother, that was rude.” The mother took her daughter’s rebuke as a personal attack on her authority as the head of the family. From that one careless gossip 3 people suddenly notchup a load more stress and more was about to errupt.

 

The mother (90 years old) retired to her bedroom and summoned her two daughters and niece to her room and immediately charged her eldest daughter (70 years old) with having the audacity to challenge her and daring to place her husband before her mother. This eldest daughter stood her ground and a violent argument ensued.

 

The upshot was that the two daughters and the niece left the room and the mother stayed in bed and refused to move or accept anything to eat or drink for two days. That is until the husband fed up with the trauma and stress the mother was causing knocked on her door, entered the room and ordered his mother-in-law to stop behaving like a child, stop the nonsense and get out of bed. As expected this caused an incomprehensible shock that broke the silence. Within a few minutes the mother was protesting and giving orders, which largely everyone ignored.

 

During the following days my client’s mother-in-law had dug up a 70 year old festering emotional hurt and accused her daughter of rejecting her all her life. A few more associated and similarly unresolved emotional issues also came to the surface. The mother then denounced her daughter as no longer her daughter and therefore a non person in her life. The daughter now felt mortally wounded as her stress levels soared.

 

A little research showed none of the mother’s accusations were true save for the daughter not being able to digest milk from birth. Therefore, her inability to suckle the mother became a twisted emotional perception of rejection. Although the 90 year old mother is fully lucid and is well acquainted with the science of genetic programming and genetic imprinting, she chooses to support her perception of rejection by ignoring known medical facts.

 

The mother has now mostly isolated herself refusing most help from her second daughter or niece and has stopped taking important medication. This had caused additional stress to circulate the entire family and a real nightmare for my lient. Now he had to live with the daily crying, grieving emotional shock of his wife as well as her fears of what happens if her mother were to die while hating and rejecting her.

 

The entire family has been touched and is in someway experiencing increased stress to certain levels. The four major sufferers are the mother the two daughters and the niece. The two husbands have lost any respect for their mother-in-law as this recent affair has confirmed all their observations of manipulating behaviours and emotional game playing. They do not much care about the argument but are experiencing increased stress as a result of the effect on their wives. Other members of the family are influenced but not really over stressed by these events.

 

Further research found that the mother controlled her family and held overall power very much in the style of a puppeteer. The mother held power by game playing and threats. These were largely emotional blackmailing. Clearly the mother was still using game playing in an attempt to hold power.

 

Though not realising the fact the balance of power had changed. This was because the mother had never happened to comment on any sensitive issue that challenged the sleeping tiger. Now a new leader has been jerked out of his neutral position, he is managing the situation from a completely different perspective. Being an observer he explained the nature of the mother’s game and attempt to regain power. Although difficult to persuade at first, the main players are now thinking with a different mind strategy thus changing their behaviour as well as gradually deleting old beliefs. All but the mother are at this stage sitting on the sideline watching and observing. This means that the mother is exhausting herself punching at shadows. It also means that the stress felt by everyone but the mother has largely melted away simply because all have understood the fear and now have a better message. 

 

The remaining and most difficult change is for the mother to understand, accept and integrate herself into a new role and behaviour. Her behaviour has activated a new leader, there is no way back. Clearly, the mother is playing the hurt game for sympathy and will take a stab at exerting the feeling of her old power. This will happen in any way she feels capable of doing and at the slightest sense of an opportunity.

 

When breaking down the elements of this case it is clearly a common scenario that can occur in any family. With a few minor modifications, the same situation happens in work environments particularly where there are longer term employees who regard their presence as invaluable or indispensable. There are a veritable army of techniques of game playing to gain and hold power. Largely speaking the domestic victims like senior management knows about most situations. Unwillingly they play into the hands of manipulators because they do not want to rock the boat. Invariably the upper management falls into the trap of fearing the damage or fallout of intervening.

 

Those responsible for playing these power games mostly know how far they can go. Invariable they eventually become overconfident or simply careless. At that time they force their own removal and there is rarely any of the perceived fallout.

 

Unfortunately the fallout has already happened in the form of considerable stress for one or more people involved, (the victims) which can so often reach epic proportions.

 

For those used to raising or coping with children, who recognises from the above case, typical child tactics to control their parents. Just as weak management chooses to overlook certain issues, is for the same reason that parents fear to deal with their child’s behaviour. The answer  to why.  Because of the perceived consequences.

 

So here is the big question. When it all goes wrong who is to blame?

 

Is it the middle or senior management for not dealing with the situation appropriately as soon as it was detected? Is it the person or others responsible for the power games with associated manipulative strategies or is it the unsuspecting victim, the person who hits the overwhelming stress? In the above case history, is it the mother or the daughters at fault.

 

Well clearly all involved carry responsibility for a share of the damage. Then there is the shock that it is the over stressed victim who carries the greatest responsibility. In this case it is the daughters who are most responsible for their own stress and unhappiness. That’s unfair surely.

 

Well, the way stress works is that fear is the key. Somewhere there is a fear that the victim turns into an insurmountable mountain. Fear changes perceptions and fear stops someone from achieving there full potential. Fear focuses one’s attention on avoiding any danger. When this happens it cuts creative thinking or experiencing new things. Fear causes unaccountable behaviour patterns usually against the victim’s best interests. Fear also takes away self confidence, self leadership and self responsibility. The mother used the ultimate fear strategy at her disposal; she stopped taking her prescribed medicines. The immediate fear this was designed to create was – oh my God what if she dies?

 

Each one of us is responsible for accepting, mastering or resolving our personal fears. No one else can do that for us. Each one of us is responsible for how we perceive, understand and deal with the emotion of fear. In failing to be self accountable we invariably cede our personal power and leadership to others. That is usually to our own considerable disadvantage. The consequences are more and more forever mounting stress.

 

Fear also causes people to corrupt their beliefs and values in the name of a quiet life and that puts additional power in the hands of the unscrupulous and the game players. The creates two stressors. Working against personal beliefs is like driving your car with the hand blake on. Considerable stress is caused somewhere inside and something will likely be damaged or break. Secondly, knowing one is being manipulated develops anotherstress in the form of feeling powerless.

 

In this case history the mother was the Queen bee because she controlled by fear. The daughters and the niece relinquished their self leadership because they could not see how they had been conditioned for all their lives.  Finally a 70 year dominance and stressor was broken because the daughters and niece were persuaded to take responsibility for themselves. They were persuaded to take back the control of their own emotions. They were shown how to stop allowing their emotions to be hijacked by game playing and well practiced strategies. They were shown how to step back from the fear of what could happen but probably will not. That meant they were no longer focusing on perceiving the worst. They were shown the difference between caring for their mother while not being made responsible for their mother’s happiness or her life. 

 

The thing that really broke the mothers control and the super stressor was when the two daughters and the niece accepted that if the Queen bee chooses to cause her own death by not taking her medication then she alone has to take responsibility for that. Once the fear had been understood it disappeared. Once the fear had disappeared the stress simply drained away, there was nothing to hold it there any longer.

 

Although the three women did not like the concept of stepping back from their aged mother, once the seed had been sown they eventually realised it was essential to their own peace. As it was, it turned out that to stop the mothers medication was not life threatening but only meant the mother would suffer more pain and discomfort. Thus, another fear and stress base guided assumption faded into non existence. The mothers false reality veils were beginning to crumble and fall.

 

This case history and short explanation illustrates that we are all responsible for our own future happiness also for what we choose to be believable truths. As one law judge once said, “The truth is a mere perception and can rarely be found.”

 

So much stress is all about false perceptions and associated fears. When one learns how to manage feelings of fear in order to find a solution life takes on a whole new dimension of possibility. It is so much easier to master stressful situations by looking for the fear factors that underpin the stress driven belief. Facing the music whether emotional or based on other issues is usually far less painful than perceived. Most people are said to dislike change and will do anything to avoid a scene or cause problems. One should always keep in mind how overwhelming stress or worse, burnout, is a terrible price to pay for a false appearance of peace.

 

What is the learning?

 

1. In any state of stress find the underpinning fear or fears.
2. Look for any long established beliefs, values or behaviours that underpin the fear aspect of the stressful situation.
3. If used correctly fear becomes a personal guidance system. GPS is to guide you to where you want to go on the ground by providing information you do not have. Fear can be described as a guidance system to understand there is some important information you are missing or ignoring concerning the situation.
4. Where at all possible obtain a clear, pragmatic, third party view of the situation that is devoid of recommendations or advice.
5. Find the message of the fear emotion. That is, the missing information.
6. Take back whatever self control you may have let go of in the past.
7. Take back your own leadership.
8. Move forward to an agreeable lower stress future.

 

Certainly it is always important to consult your doctor. The above eight points do not come easily as a rule, therefore, you may well also find considerable help in hiring a life coach specialising in stress management who will guide you through the process.

Would you like to have my personal support to guide you out of your high stress situation FREE of charge.

 

I want to publish as many case histories as possible to demonstrate how to find the deep stressors also how to take back control. 

Names, gender, places and dates are changed so there is no possible chance of recognition.

 

If you are in a high stress situation and cannot find a way out, all you have to do is ask for help. Contact me Robert Denton at robertdenton@rdcoaching-power.com with a brief description of your stressful situation.

 

Robert P. Denton

Power-mind trainer and coach

Recovery from Stress, Overwhelm and Burnout Update 1.

Overwhelming stress or Burnout Recovery is all to do with the cause and the degree of burnout. First it is important to know that burnout is not an illness like depression. Stress and burnout is a state of self protection, internal healing and protection from damage to the brain and body, largely as a result of prolonged and excessive amounts of cortisol known as the stress hormone.

I have to reiterate the notion that recovery from stress is likely to be a limiting approach to the severe stress problem. Any notion or attempt to think or do anything that is designed in any way to take the sufferer to recovery will be blocked. Trying to go back to the state from where they first developed the high stress thinking patterns will immediately clash with their 7^th sense intelligence protection system. My most recent conclusion on studying stress relief is that the word recovery is associated with going back to where you were before and that is the last thing your 7^th sense will allow you to do. Thus my assertion is that the 7^th sense intelligence system is the master of the game not the stress sufferer. The next thing to realise is that in practically all cases of high stress and burnout the sufferer is doing all the wrong things to affect a happy and confident sate of mind. Starting with, fighting it. Trying to make a supreme effort to recovery. Smothering it with anti-depressants. Trying to be dynamic. Trying to live a normal life. Resisting or ignoring their intuition, 7^th sense intelligence and ignoring a life long talent they have possibly active avoided. Beyond these there are many other behaviours that directly or indirectly feed a growing stress cycle.

I realise the 7^th sense theory is a new concept therefore I will explain more of the subtlety of mind and self protection programming, which is certainly all part of the immune system.

For those readers familiar with the process of cognitive neuro transfer (receiving information from another person, animal or other life forms, also know as telepathy) the 7^th sense process is in essence an internal communication between conscious and unconscious thought and memory and a protection system that is doing its best to stop you doing the very things that are damaging your mental and physical health.

The question I have been asking during this ongoing study is; why should the body/mind want to slow or block itself? I fervently believe that at least one of the answers is due to this internal protection and healing system. What is so important to understand is that our world and the environments we live in and sustain have totally outstripped the evolutionary development of our internal protection and healing systems. What appears to be happening is that the body/mind system has been forced to fallback and depend almost entirely on its back stop of massive emotional trauma, which is now being referred to as overwhelming stress and burnout.

In many countries, particularly the United States of America and now western Europe stress sufferers are depending heavily on anti-depressants and similar drugs that essentially num the mind. Years of study have shown the alarming side effects most of the popular anti-depressants have on the users of those drugs in the long term. The awareness of the words ‘long term’ indicates those drugs are not only dangerous but not really of much use in relieving high stress. Certainly there is the issue of their damaging effects also they simply attempt to treat or smother the symptoms. Medical history is awash with evidence of the folly and the regularity of treating the symptom not the condition.

Modern research into how the mind works has conclusively demonstrated for many years how important emotions are as indicators that some psychological problems have stacked up and have been ignored. We disregard internal emotional signals at our greater peril. Anti-depressants depress and smother emotional signals. Awareness of high or overwhelming stress is awareness of internal emotional signals doing their best to tell us to stop doing what we are doing. This is because we are damaging internal states of balance, which normally permit the immune and health systems to function properly. That is why anti-depressants do not work, certainly not in the long term.

There are many issues to address concerning the anti-stress industry. I will touch on two of them here. One is evolution. Evolution takes a long time and yes, I certainly agree that stress has been around also for a long time. Stress is part of the fight or flight system that causes the body to produce the hormones adrenaline and cortisol, both, of which assist muscle function and performance including mental performance. In small and irregular doses these hormones are highly effective and mostly beneficial. Overwhelming stress and burnout signal that the person has been hugely overdosing on these substances. That signal is an indication of a state that is damaging, dangerous and even deadly.

Go back 200 years when few things changed. What did change was a gradual process. The people of that age are recorded in history to have even so been stressed by those changes. In the world of life, professional or high performance coaching the fact that changing a behaviour is difficult and stressful is well understood. The further back we go in history we discover how slowly evolution can take to change. Take the stone age axe for example, which evolved over hundreds of thousands of years and then when it had reached the peak of its design potential it remained unchanged for 65 thousand years. Now fast forward to today, evolution does not have a chance. We are forced to do the thing evolution cannot do. The modern world people of today do not have the option to take time to settle down and feel comfortable with all the things in our lives. As soon as we have something and just reached partial understanding of it, it is already outdated, redundant and superseded. This is what stress is all about.

The paradox is that the last thing we need to do to manage stress is to long for recover. Recovery is going back into the past. Recovery is trying to create an even worse stress situation. There is only one way in this world and that is to go forward. Therefore my conclusion is that in treating and healing overwhelming stress and burnout is in finding how to go forward under those conditions.

Amazingly the solution is far more simple than could be possible realised beforehand. Finding the way forward is immediately working with the 7^th sense system. Starting the process of working with the 7^th sense system and not against it is the first key to unlock the problem. Once this is started it instantly cuts off the stress hormone production also the emotional feelings of overwhelming stress.  As the 7^th sense intelligence is a new understanding of complex mental processes of the immune system it is wise to reiterate part of its working pattern. That is the part of the mind process designed to protect and heal ourselves. The 7^th sense is devoted to warning us via emotions of stress about behaviour patterns belief and values, which may have had a value in the past but are now redundant and must be changed and avoided.

Recently I was watching a CNN broadcast interview of a young man who had just quit his job. The coach who had been engaged to prepare the man to find a new job asked the following question. Quote:  “Why in this difficult period of job losses and a challenging time to find jobs, have you quit a secure job?” The young man said, “When I took the job I had a goal, a mission and a passion. I have successfully fulfilled that mandate and now the job has changed. The skills required no longer conform to my own skills therefore I want to find a new job, which is within my skill set, challenging and satisfying.” As I herd these words I though, how smart for this young man to listen and take note also act on his 7^th sense intelligence. Had he stuck in his job he would have worked himself into a high stress situation.

For those already in a high stress situation or burnout this is not a silver bullet, one shot and it is all over. First the process requires time to find and understand the cause with its associated factors. The following and most demanding part is the behaviour change process. Even when change is well under way, a person under treatment requires constant guidance. They will need support to sustain the change also to spot and avoid the dangers of falling back into old bad habits especially during the tough times of withdrawal.

Robert P. Denton  Mind-Power and Performance coach

NeuroScience and the Seventh Sense Solution

Neuroscience and the Seventh Sense Solution

My recent article on the 7^th sense solution to stress and burnout has caused considerable interest and demand for further insights into this specific concept of neuroscience and its implication for moving out of overwhelming stress.

I have to reiterate the notion that recovery from stress is likely to be a limiting approach to the severe stress problem. Any notion that in any way will take the sufferer back to the state from where they first developed the high stress thinking patterns will immediately clash with their 7^th sense protection. The word recovery is associated with going back to where you were before and that is the last thing your 7^th sense will allow you to do.

I realise the 7^th sense is a new concept therefore I will explain more of the subtlety of mind and self protection programming, which is certainly all part of the immune system.

Cognitive neuro transfer of not just information but feelings and preview of what is about to happen. This gives an insight of the 7^th sense concept theory. For those not familiar with the process of cognitive neuro transfer it works like this. If you have ever watched someone as they have an accident, for example being in the same work space and seeing a knife slip and slice deep into someone’s hand. You or an observer will instantly experience a shiver and will actually feel the pain and the trauma. The interesting thing is that the observer can suffer a greater shock or trauma than the victim. This is less apparent if the viewing is remote such as on the television although this varies with different people. There is however a difference between perceived cognitive neuro transfer and actual cognitive neuro transfer. Viewing someone having an accident on the television is perceived cognitive neuro transfer. This is nonetheless important because it helps to understand how real cognitive neuro transfer works.

This is likely due to; first the actual cognitive neuro transfer of information and feeling from the victim to the observer plus the observer also reliving a memory of feelings, pain, emotions, etc., of the same or perhaps a similar accident. Added to these two sources of feelings and flow of information is a third, the perceived cognitive neuro transfer that arrives seconds after the first two. These three alone are important enough but there is a fourth that adds another dimension, which connects to the 6th sense of intuitive and telepathic awareness also the 7^th sense theory. This occurs when the observer suddenly is aware the accident is about to happen milli-seconds before the event. This suggests that the victim also knows what is about to happen. Therefore the total cognitive neuro transfer is complex and occurs in an incredibly short time frame. This time frame is too short to permit conscious though intervention. This fact suggests the whole process of cognitive neuro transfer happens in nano seconds rather than milliseconds.

As explained in my previous article on the 7^th sense theory this neuro program recognises any attempt to return or recover from overwhelming stress. Recognising that thought pattern will activate the same thinking processes that got you into overwhelming stress thus, the 7^th sense protection immediately blocks whatever the plan or thinking pattern is. By the time you have begun to construct the remotest though for recovery the 7^th sense immediately clicks into action.

It is impossible to trick, fool or otherwise camouflage any thought from this neuro program. This theory therefore, suggests the most effective way out of overwhelming stress or burnout is therefore to move forward to something totally different. Totally different means totally different accompanying beliefs, values, behaviours and in some cases environment, authenticity beliefs also perceived or real identity, just for a start.

For example: Let us say someone now in overwhelming stress or burnout has been an entrepreneur and the management of the company or companies was a major contributor to the burnout. Any attempt at recovery or even moving out and away from high stress or burnout that in any way resembles starting and running another enterprise will automatically block any such plan and could even activate a serious relapse.

This poses a serious quandary for most sufferers, doctors and therapists, which is simply because the main concern is recovery. Certainly there are numerous people who have partial recovery from burnout. The 7^th sense solution works with this 7^th sense and the neuro trauma of burnout not against it. The amazing thing that also came to light in understanding this 7^th sense process, is that part of the overwhelming stress development was because the sufferer was not only working against their greater potential they had ignored an important talent or gift. That is to say they were actually working against their underlying greater capability and internal vibrations. That also means they were out of synchronization with their natural energy, their real identity and a more profound authenticity. It is rather like trying to break down a fortress with a sledge hammer while the key to the fortress door in hanging on the wall. The irony and paradox of the 7^th sense theory is that it is so obvious once you are shown what the key looks like.

In working with the 7^th sense you will discover your or the persons hidden or overlooked talent or gift. The solution is to move towards expressing that talent. Working towards that will change everything else including beliefs, values, behaviours and much more. The moment the sufferer begins to work in this direction the universe seems to work with them in incredible ways completely unplanned and unexpected. The process only works provided the stress sufferer is open to what they may have been consciously avoiding for many years. That is to say the sufferer is the master of the keys and door keeper to their own healing process.

Robert P. Denton  Mind-Power and performance coach

CUTTING STRESS OUT OF YOUR LIFE

Cutting Stress Out of Your Life

It does not matter how you cut the stress cake at the end of the day stress is all about deep seated beliefs and values. From then on escaping overwhelming stress starts to become more difficult the deeper you delve into why you got into the stress situation. Having experienced severe burnout myself this is may latest article. 10 years of observation and analysing what happened and why, how I moved out of burnout also how I deal with further stress in my life continues to reveal possibilities for new solutions.

 

Working as a mind-power performance coach with one hard working and dedicated husband, the current stress eventually boiled down to his wife and the environment or location of the home, sweet home.

 

No, this is not a wife bashing article. Rather an illustration of how one partners expectations and needs conflicting with the others, equals massive stress for both. In this case the wife had prominence because the husband had changed country and found developing his own business and interests in a foreign country extremely difficult. This is not to suggest that it is all the wife’s fault as the husband willingly chose to move. The problem started to evolve mainly in an attempt to conform and please his wife.

 

The story unfolds to indicate how authentic behaviours, space and environment to express one’s creative inclinations are closely tied to self expression, creative fulfilment and emotional stability. Reduced motional stability is well known to be directly linked to rising stress, and depleting health. In this case the husband, normally fit and free of aches and pains began to develop all sorts of pains in just about every joint in his body as the stress mounted to massive levels.

 

I did say this was not a wife bashing article. The wife is part of the stress cycle so she cannot be excluded. The client realised the problem and the source of his stress and made moves to change his behaviour and values. The trouble was that his plan to develop his business directly conflicted with his wife’s plans and expectations for her own satisfaction. Even though the husband and wife discussed his situation and plans and the wife supported the husband she promptly made all sorts of claims on his time that completely blocked his project. The couple are now heading towards some sort of separate lives as the husband feels this is the only way he can achieve his own needs, expectations, authentic creative self and emotional stability therefore, also reduce the stress. Although loving his wife he is able to make the divide between a personal relationship and individual professional objectives. He strongly feels that now he has to make some sort of physical break to escape his wife’s damaging influence on his life.

 

Certainly the pending separate lives, is in itself stressful for both parties. Hopefully the wife will realise she stands to loose most of all and thus moderate her attitude. The husband realises that the partial separate lives will not only be stressful certainly to start with, it could possibly lead to a complete separation and divorce. From his position as much as the new situation will be stressful his overall gain will dramatically reduce his stress level. As much as he sees the partial separation with all its ramifications as being stressful in itself, he also sees that the belief that they are bound together indefinitely by a piece of paper and a promise as limiting and adding to his stress. Therefore, separation could actually be the best solution for them both. Why? Because the consequences of the action of their marriage did not produce the expected results. Though sad to say, this union is more destructive than creative even though the two have a deep love for each other. The problem for him is meeting all his wife’s expectations while desperately making every effort to create an income. Providing and income is also part of his wife’s expectations thus he feels himself between a rock and a hard place.

 

Returning to where this article started, it is clear that the belief that these two people can have a fruitful and fulfilling life together just because they have a love for each other and have many common values is not the right basis for a marriage. As the wife is adamant that she cannot change her life because of her business, this unbending stance does in itself raise more complex issues. Although the wife makes a great noise about the importance of the couple it is clear she has chosen her life style and business in preference to her marriage, while demanding her husband makes all necessary sacrifices to meet her expectations. The only conclusion is that the marriage and the couple fit her beliefs and values provided it is all in accordance with her wishes. That’s the rub and as we all know when things rub there is stress, tension and eventually something breaks.

 

It’s not all bad news, there is a significant possibility that partial separate lives could suit this couple very well once they acknowledge the fact and develop new albeit a different relationship. This highlights again the fundamental issue that to move out of a stressful situation somewhere or other prevailing beliefs and values have to change.

 

Above I have mentioned four important factors in the stress cycle.  Unmet expectations, inability to engage in self expression of creative fulfilment and emotional stability, another is authentic behaviour.

 

Perhaps everyone understands the frustration and growing conscious and unconscious stress of unmet expectations or failed dreams. What few people do is to honour the unmet expectations by observing what happened and analysing why they remain unmet. Also looking again to see what is really important and what could make the difference so those unmet dreams can finally come to life and reality.

 

In our coaching sessions the husband was able to work through this process and recognised how he had allowed himself to become victim to his wife’s unrealistic expectations. Therefore, he chose to make the move that puts the power for his actions back in his own hands. The gamble is that his wife will choose to change her stance and behaviour. If not, he sees that whichever way the dice roll he comes out the winner. He has now prepared himself for a complete rupture even though he still has a love for his wife. He recognises that evolving personally and being authentic to his own creativity is preferable to the life he has been living.

 

The inability to engage in self expression of creative fulfilment is a little bit of a mouthful yet mostly well understood. Perhaps the worst problem with this condition is that in many cases the person gradually becomes a victim to not being able to engage themselves in whatever it is they really want to do. Daily grinding away doing a job you hate is an effective way of limiting your own creative potential and thus, building your own stress. The longer the inactivity or wrong activity prevails the more it becomes normal and is tolerated. The damaging aspect is that the conscious mind does not see or is not aware of some important drivers of stress and overwhelming stress.

 

Authentic behaviours cover many aspects of our personal lives, so I will only touch on one or two of them. These are the authentic behaviours, which give a sense of achievement and a feeling of being in the right place and doing the right job or occupation. This awareness gives a feeling of immense internal satisfaction, peace or tranquillity. Many other internal feelings also say yes, I am truly expressing myself, I and my life have value. This is not a haphazard process rather something or things that may have required years of training, improvement and change to achieve that really fulfilling level of engagement. Authentic behaviours are the all important essence of capability that is writ deep in genetic coding and programming. An example is akin to a primitive African coastal fishing boat being used to ferry large numbers of people searching for a better life, across rough seas and long journeys, which the boat is not designed for. All to often such boats break up and sink. That is why, when the expression of internal stress is stifled, the stress begins to accelerate rapidly. After all what is more stressful than not being able to be your true self or manifest your capabilities or dreams?

 

This is exactly the situation of the above client and case history. He has found himself virtually entrapped, imprisoned in an environment, which is comfortable and loving yet he finds himself virtually fenced off from his own needs to fulfil his creative inspiration. Being caught in a tender trap pretty well sums it up yet beneath the tenderness there is a truly deadly trap. I am well aware of the meaning and use of the word deadly. For those who would doubt this, please look up the dangers of the stress hormone cortisol, sudden death syndrome, depression driven suicide and other side effects or spin-offs of overwhelming stress. This however is not only deadly in that sense but also deadly to self expression creative thinking, building dreams, having a reason to live. The result is usually boredom, lack of interest in anything or mind numbness, otherwise, aggression, hate, violence or any other rebellious behaviours.

 

Robert P. Denton   Mind-power and Performance coach

The Modern Logic and Science of Ancient Success Strategies

The Modern Logic and Science of Ancient Success Strategies

 

The modern science of neuro-science coaching.

 

There are an increasing number of organisations popping up like mushrooms on the internet with dynamic marketing methods to sell their amazing secret. These are their secret discoveries of guaranteed success in achieving anything you want in your life.

 

Many people see these services as scams and false promises. Then again there are thousands more who are clambering for a slice of their knowledge and secrets.

 

Well, those scam seekers may have just reason to feel as they do because non of those fantastic claims of passing on secrets are secrets. They have been around for hundreds if not hundreds of thousands of years. These so called secrets were exactly what drove ape-man to become modern-man. So lets fast forward to just 4,000 or 5,000 years ago when the ancient Egyptians, Greeks, Chinese and Indian traders were doing with great success. It is what every business school and BMA course teach around the world.

 

So what are these great secrets that everyone knows but don’t seem to know they know unless they pay varying amounts of money to learn?

 

Well, first of all, probably the best kept secret is that the secret is what you did when you were a tiny baby and you never stop doing it until the day you die.

 

Hold on! In that case we should all be fantastically rich and have all the good health, happiness, freedom from stress plus everything else we want in life.

 

Ah yes. Now you are touching the critical point. The secret is not the knowledge of what to do, you already know that. The secret is how to best to use that knowledge. Accept it is not a secret. It is more the case that with the open market and more and more people realising they can do their own thing, mastering this knowledge has suddenly become the number one interest. So its not so much a secret than pulling the veil of non enlightenment away from obscuring the resources you already have and know.

 

OK, so let’s look at what these so called secrets are. First we go back to when you were a baby and you decided that lying in in your bed all day was a bit limiting. After all, you had things to do in your life and really could not afford to lay around all day. So you focused on those tall people in your world and decided that was what you wanted to be and do. That was the first germ of the idea and you were excited about it. Every day you focused on that one goal and little else other than food, drink and having fun, that is except for bath time, oh yuk. So all day long, even when asleep you dreamt about what you wanted to do and planned every detail of how you were going to do it. Now checking the detail of what you had to do was the first action plan. There was lots of time to do that so you were relaxed about it and decided to do it properly. You realised that some effort was necessary and that you had to develop other resources such as better muscle power. Frankly, the resources you had were not up to the task or the goal. Therefore you decided to work out at the gym every day to build those biceps, a decent six-pack and some nice thigh muscles. You didn’t yet have the financial resources to hire a personal body building coach, so you used what resources were around you and freely available.

 

First of all there was a constant flow of helpers who would voluntarily assist by holding out a finger or two. These you latched onto and started your daily pull-ups to work on your biceps, triceps and six-pack. Then usually in the evening these helpers would start bouncing exercises, which you converted into your own secret muscle building exercises to develop the strong leg muscles you needed to crawl, stand upright and then walk.

 

Fair enough, I think you have the idea now. You spent your time totally focused on the detail of your plan with all the effort and action necessary to make the dream a reality. Certainly it was not all smooth going and at times you were reduced to tears because of the frustration of the time it was taking. Yes, there were some mistakes, errors and setbacks not to mention the occasional painful experience when things did not quite work out as expected.

 

You were tenacious, you persevered, you observed how those tall people stood up and walked and you reworked your progress strategy and dream detail. You learnt from your mistakes to avoid doing those again as they hurt also you kept up the body building exercises. You worked on the dream and the detail until you achieved the first stage. Now you were crawling. Great, first a quick celebration with a glass of champagne then back to the dream, ultimate goal and perfection of the detail and best action plan.

 

Now you have broken through the first barrier things start to progress a little quicker. The body building is taking more of your time. However you are taking regular rest periods and naps during, which time you consciously and unconsciously work on the dream and creating a mental image of you standing upright and walking.

 

Fantastic things are developing very well and suddenly one day, wheeee! You are there. You have done it. Success and another glass of champagne. Now this is very exciting and certainly you are getting a lot of attention and lots of grownups seem to be coming to study your technique and skill. It clearly seems they want to learn something from your magnificent capability.

 

As all this success and back slapping is going on you realise that the more planning and effort you make brings greater success. The more success and the more you grow. Thus, the more people seem to want to come and see you. So they clearly value your capability and what you have to offer. From this observation your deduced that the more you work on perfecting your dream and goal and the more effort you put into realising it as a new reality, the more people keep crowding in to see you. Something else you realised was that the more successful you became the more they seemed to want to share your dream.

 

Another thing you observed was that this was show time. That is, if you did the wrong things your growing audience were not pleased and likely would leave quickly. But repetition of what those grownups like and want, meant that bigger numbers arrived to see you more frequently. Yes you got more attention. In a nut shell, you realised that the secret was to give your public what they want. Furthermore, when they want it and in the right packaging to suit their beliefs and hey presto, life is just one big giggle and another glass of celebratory champagne. Now with this new found success strategy you developed a more sophisticated taste and started adding a few luxuries with a little caviar, a bigger apartment and a new car. Well you don’t actually remember organising or paying for those things, they just seemed to arrive and you presumed these were natural rewards for effort, right thinking and success.

 

You see, I have just explained exactly what you will relearn in any business school and from any one of these new businesses promising you long held secrets of how to achieve your dreams.

 

Secrets? No, that’s not what they are selling at all. Oh yes, certainly they will give you some reminders of what you already know (unconsciously) and some of it you will realise you already are doing. Certainly these are nicely repackaged as secrets. So what are they really selling? First they are selling; support in how to make the most use of your resources and secondly coaching you to stay focused on the best thinking patters.

 

Why are they in such demand, so successful and why are they mushrooming now? The simple answer is that the time is right. The longer answer is that social beliefs, values, behaviours and environments are changing fast. People around the world are facing fundamental shifts in the need to perform in different ways, higher levels and developing their lives with different goals. Many more are realising that by taking responsibility for themselves and their futures, there are many benefits. Many more are realising to be rich is no longer an unachievable dream. The evolutionary process is now so fast most people need guidance and support to change ideas, values and behaviours. Rethink their beliefs about their identity, image also what is the meaning of authenticity.

 

All these issues are the new science of modern neuro-science. Modern neuro-science understands more about how the mind works to achieve goals and turn dreams into reality than understanding how the brain is constructed or how it functions at the mechanical level. This modern neuro-science is more in the hands of a new generation of life performance coaches and mind performance coaches than in the hands of the psychologists or scientists.

 

Robert Denton    Mind Power Performance Coach